Sooner or Later

Health Update

My apologies again for the dearth of updates, but thankfully, my journey with cancer has become rather boring! My CT scans have gone from every three months to four, and my brain MRIs from every three months to every six – both signs that my immunotherapy treatment has been very effective. To recap, I started with 13 tumours/lesions – 10 in the brain, one in a lymph node, one in an adrenal gland, and one in a lung. The one in my lung is still visible but doctors think it is inactive. The rest are just scar tissue. Can’t complain about that result. I’m continuing monthly treatment at Princess Margaret Hospital, which consists of a few hours for blood tests and review by the oncologist, and a 45-minute IV treatment the next day, and of course, periodic CTs and MRIs – definitely not a hardship! Just have to keep working to recover my stamina as it’s notably lacking.

Recently, my oncologist reported that recent studies indicate people (like me) who have responded well to the treatment have a 90% chance of living 10 years. When you factor in that this treatment is relatively new, with limited long-term data, I’m definitely going to assume this is a minimum survival rate. LOL.

Family Update

And I’m hoping I’ve inherited my parents’ long-life genes. My mother passed away this past New Year’s Eve, aged 91. While she passed peacefully, her last few years were challenged by dementia and the fragility of her body. She insisted she no longer wanted a funeral, as none of her friends were still alive to come. I had to gently remind her that funerals weren’t really FOR her – they were ABOUT her, but they were FOR us. She begrudgingly agreed, so we held a “celebration of life” reception attended by about 75 people, including the friend who set my parents up on a blind date, 70 years before!

My father had been living on his own (while my mother was in a nursing home) in the rather large “ancestral” home built by my great-great-grandfather circa 1869. Being a rather social type, he decided to move into a year-old seniors home just up the road in Brighton. He describes it like being on a cruise ship without a pool, and it IS very nice. And at 92, he continues to do all kinds of online research for and about people. His latest project is about the people who owned the farm on which the seniors home was built – Russian aristocrats who managed to escape after the 1917 revolution and had various adventures before settling down in Brighton.

New Family Member

I’m pleased to announce that Apollo now has (a sometimes annoying) little brother appropriately named Zeus 😉 That said, I’m not quite sure what made me think getting a new puppy was a good idea… Zeus is now 6 months old, and Apollo will be 14 years old in August. Despite the fact that one just wants to play (whenever he’s not sleeping) and the other is so over playing with anyone, I think they might be starting to work out how to survive together (the photo at right and the one at the top of this post are definitely misleading!) Some of you will remember Apollo (who, as a pupp,y looked very much like Zeus) coming into our Ministry of Culture office and occasionally marking his territory when he wasn’t sleeping under my desk.

Not sure if it’s a pro or con, but at this point, Zeus is a little too chaotic to walk together with Apollo, which means twice as many walks for me – good for building stamina, I guess, but in this heat not the most pleasant undertaking…

The “Peoples” of Forest Hill Village

And totally not related to my cancer journey – as many of you know, I live in a four-story walk-up in Forest Hill Village on Spadina north of St Clair. Luckily, I’m on the lower level, so only a few steps to worry about. For my heritage related friends, the building, like the others around it, was built in the 1920s when Forest Hill was still a stand-alone village outside of the City of Toronto. And while hundreds of people walk over it every week, there is a manhole cover in the sidewalk near my building stamped 1927! I’m already planning a birthday party in 2027 LOL.

Since I spend a lot of time walking dogs (and some occasional shopping) in my neighbourhood, I usually pass lots of people depending on the time of day and while waiting for them to do their business (the dogs, not the people!) I have lots of time to observe them (the people, not the dogs!) While out for dinner with neighbours last week, we agreed that many can be grouped in certain categories.

• The Housewives of Forest Hill (HOFH) – These are mostly younger or trying to stay young, women in tight-fitting workout clothing, coming to or going from the nearby gym to their giant SUVs, most often with earbuds in, listening to…well, who knows. They rarely make eye contact and really only interact with others of their ilk. Apollo and I passed two HOFH just the other day and overheard one telling the other, “We’ve been planning our honeymoon for Australia and Fiji in December.” Maybe I’m just jealous (not really!)
• Students – Bishop Strachan School is at the end of my block, and Upper Canada College is a few blocks further. That means three times a day, there are “hordes” of students walking to or from the subway or into the Village for lunch. They are usually loud and a bit rambunctious but generally polite, and at least they aren’t stealing hubcaps or cars or worse 😉 Of course, it’s much more peaceful this time of year with just a few involved with both schools’ summer camp programs.
• School Staff – Clearly, there are lots of teachers and admin staff also coming to and fro from both BSS and UCC, either in the morning, afternoon, or just to grab a coffee in the village. When I was still working, I’d often pass them in the opposite direction on my way to or from the subway. Many have learned the dogs’ names and stop to acknowledge them (just the dogs, of course.)  Several years ago, one of the teachers invited Jazz and Apollo to her retirement party in the staff lounge. I tagged along just, well…because. I watched some of the younger staff get married and now drop their kid(s) off at the daycare across the street.
• Daycare Parents – There are two daycares located at the end of my block and on almost all my dog walk routes. These parents are usually preoccupied with getting their kiddies out of their car seats and into the daycare – or, of course, the reverse in the afternoons. They are pleasant enough, although they usually are only chatting with other daycare parents. The most we get is “Oh look at the puppy – isn’t he cute?” I smile at them, but clearly I’m just the supporting cast…
• Domestic Staff – The multi-million dollar homes that start at the end of my block employ plenty of nannies and housekeepers who are almost exclusively Filipino. (The short bus route from St Clair West subway up Spadina to Eglinton and back is often referred to as the “nannie express.”) They are much friendlier than the HOFH, usually smiling and often saying good morning. One has been saying hello for probably 15 years or more and knows my previous and current dogs’ names. There are also school cleaning staff we pass on that last walk on the night as they head to the subway – again always pleasant even at the end of a late shift.  I sometimes feel they are invisible, particularly to the HOFH.
• Neighbours with Dogs – Anyone who has dogs knows that you often end up getting to “know” other dog owners in your neighbourhood, and I’m no exception. That’s assuming your dogs get along – or at least won’t attack each other while you’re chatting away and sharing neighbourhood gossip (I admit it!) Sometimes it’s just a pleasant wave to the other side of the street if your dogs don’t play nicely together. And their is sharing both the sadness of losing a pet, and the joy of getting a new one.
• The Plurality – The largest “group” are just those out for a walk or heading into the Village for refreshments or ice cream. Several call my dogs by name. At the minimum, it’s a smile and a good morning. They are usually older (I’ll leave that undefined) and I’d guess often retired. They always make the sometimes tedious walks a more pleasant experience.

There are a few people who don’t fall into any of the above, obviously. During the school year, there is a friendly crossing guard in front of BSS who always says hi to whichever dog I have at the time and unsuccessfully tried to give my picky Apollo a treat the first few times we met. He also shared that he recently downloaded an app to identify the birds in the area by their songs, which I subsequently downloaded and love (“Merlin” from Cornell University.)

There is the “collector” who weekly wheels his shopping cart on an amazingly long route to collect beer cans and wine bottles to return for the deposits. He’s a pleasant fellow who is also mostly invisible in such an affluent neighbourhood. I always make of point of saying good morning.

Lately, there is the Bank of Montreal advisor (we have FIVE banks in two Village blocks!) whose office window is level with the sidewalk and Zeus often sits looking at him when he’s at his desk, and he waves back! We’ve even gone in to meet him in person and he’ll stop to say hi on his way to and from work.

They often say that Toronto is a city of villages, and I think that’s true. But any village is also made up of people – bankers or shopkeepers, teachers and pharmacists who know you by name (sadly LOL!) People just living their lives, and those who might well be labelled as characters. I’d probably be considered an extrovert (although I might argue that it’s situational), but isn’t life richer for engaging in your village, wherever it is?

Last Word

When I’m not walking dogs or philosophizing about villagers, I’m still serving as Director and Archivist of The Queen’s Own Rifles of Canada’s Regimental Museum and Archive. Working on updating museum policies, responding to research requests, and adding names of soldiers to our public-facing Collections Database (with 7,100 names so far!) And spending time in Brighton, which is a short drive to the attractions of Prince Edward County (friends own The Old Third Winery with an awesome past bar if you’re ever down that way) and buying lottery tickets for that elusive dream of becoming a millionaire.

Thank you to everyone for your support during my journey, and I wish you all a safe and happy summer!

John